- You need to pull your trousers down. Further down. And take that belt off. Big belts are very incovenient. And jeans... you'd think no one would want to wear these things!
I unbuckle the belt and pull the offending jeans down a bit. The squirt of cold jelly duly follows as does the ultrasound probe.
The baby doesn't feel like humouring us with a photogenic position, so the obstetrician focuses on its head for some measurements. The brain! I can see the corpus callosum, ventricles... and wish I could have a better look.
- Can I have a picture?
- No, that's illegal.
- But I'm a brain scientist, I would really like to have one of the brain as well!
- You'll learn to separate your professional interest from your motherly feelings. You should consider yourself lucky that you're even getting three pictures. I'm only allowed to give one.
That's one picture plus two fuzzy attempts at getting a good position.
- What are we looking at now? How big is the baby?
- Can you please stop asking questions? I need to check a lot of things and need to concentrate.
A bit later the concentrated frown has disappeared enough for me to venture opening my mouth again.
- So what are the things you are looking for?
- I can't tell you, there are a 100 things you can worry about. I'll tell you it has two legs, two arms, a heartbeat, a skull and a spine.
Well. Even I could see that. That leaves only 95 things I can worry about.
- So does your partner...
- I don't have a partner.
- Oh, so did you get yourself ... INSEMINATED?
- No.
- Ok, so does your SEXUAL partner...
- ...
- Don't worry. It's not uncommon.
I'm not worrying. You are.
I unbuckle the belt and pull the offending jeans down a bit. The squirt of cold jelly duly follows as does the ultrasound probe.
The baby doesn't feel like humouring us with a photogenic position, so the obstetrician focuses on its head for some measurements. The brain! I can see the corpus callosum, ventricles... and wish I could have a better look.
- Can I have a picture?
- No, that's illegal.
- But I'm a brain scientist, I would really like to have one of the brain as well!
- You'll learn to separate your professional interest from your motherly feelings. You should consider yourself lucky that you're even getting three pictures. I'm only allowed to give one.
That's one picture plus two fuzzy attempts at getting a good position.
- What are we looking at now? How big is the baby?
- Can you please stop asking questions? I need to check a lot of things and need to concentrate.
A bit later the concentrated frown has disappeared enough for me to venture opening my mouth again.
- So what are the things you are looking for?
- I can't tell you, there are a 100 things you can worry about. I'll tell you it has two legs, two arms, a heartbeat, a skull and a spine.
Well. Even I could see that. That leaves only 95 things I can worry about.
- So does your partner...
- I don't have a partner.
- Oh, so did you get yourself ... INSEMINATED?
- No.
- Ok, so does your SEXUAL partner...
- ...
- Don't worry. It's not uncommon.
I'm not worrying. You are.
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